Category Archives: Wedding Attack

Fijian Scorecard

So much to the dismay of our credit cards, we decided to go gnarly and take our honeymoon in Fiji. And it was rad, of course (and actually, surprisingly cheap). While we were there I started typing up a journal, but then I got sick and lost interest in favor of sleeping and hanging out in the bathroom (maybe I’ll post it later). Here’s the condensed version: Continue reading



Filed under Assorted Creatures, Food, Photos, Travels, Wedding Attack

It’s been a month, I should probably catch up.

So the wedding went down, and it was pretty good. Pretty, pretty, pretty good. [Shit! What if not everybody watches Curb Your Enthusiasm? Ridiculous, I know- but still possible. Therefore, a translation: “It was totally killer!”]

It looked great (thanks to Dawn and our family/friends), the ceremony was great (thanks to Justin), the food was great (thanks to Cahoots Catering), the music was great (thanks to me, the great de-facto DJ Brett, my musical pals Jason & Justin, and Gabe’s PA system), and the party was great (thanks to our guests). Dawn and I both agreed that the biggest bummer about it being over is not having all our friends in one place- which NEVER, EVER happens, and which we really enjoyed and appreciated. It also kind of seems like we didn’t get to hang out with all the guests enough, but that couldn’t really be avoided, I think.

  • So yeah, good times. Here’s a sampling of some pictures the great Jeff Newsom took. SERIOUSLY impressive.
  • And here’s our rehearsal dinner. Note that my brothers and I have a boy band called “Just 3 Broz.”
  • And lastly, here’s my bachelor party– which was held at a cabin quite literally in the middle of nowhere. You would be surprised how well actors, musicians, scientists and salesmen can shoot- at least when they have grown up in Paso Robles CA.


Filed under Deal With It, Food, Hipsterism, Photos, Travels, Uncategorized, Wedding Attack

When I’m Not Planning A Wedding

…I’ve been listening to music.

  • Arctic Monkeys- Humbug: Ok, this is a pretty great record. I never liked this band before I heard “Crying Lighting,” and then I come to find out Josh Homme recorded it? Fucking great move, boys. A fucked up reverby desert carnival atmosphere was all this band needed to be able to tickle the balls of greatness. It’s kinda like is Morrissey was a teenager in the 90’s and met Josh and they formed the Arctic Monkeys instead of QOTSA and The Smiths.
  • Drive Like Jehu: The more I listen to Jehu, the more I’m convinced they are one of the greatest bands of all time. When I was a sophomore in high school we used to have to do stupid ice breaker brain warm up exercises at the start of class. One was “Give yourself a foreign name and tell us what country you come from.” Having read about them in a magazine out of pure luck I said “I’m Jehu, from Israel.” The teacher made fun of me. Fuck him. Little did I know it would take another 5 or 6 years to again encounter Jehu’s greatness. Check out great live shit here: Do You Compute?
  • Phoenix- Wolfgang Amadeus Phoenix: There are so many things one could hold against Phoenix- they’re French, the singer is Sophia Coppola’s boyfriend, they’re French… But if nothing else, I will go to my grave loving “Lizstomania” and “1901” (and the rest of the record). Great songs and good novelty-European production (compressors sidechained to the kick drum- I’m looking at you). The record that I will always link with Summer 2009.
  • Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds- Your Funeral…My Trial: The last of the recently reissued first 4 Bad Seeds records. I’m proud of myself for not buying them all at once and giving them each a chance to soak in. A good cross between piano balladry and noise. And the documentary special features on each cd are great, of course.


Filed under Deal With It, Hipsterism, I Am Still Punk, I call them 'records' and not 'cds' because I'm an elitist, Ranting, Wedding Attack

Lessons Learned on a Long Late Drive

This is a little late, but whatever.

We went to Megan & Morgan‘s wedding about a week ago and, damn, was it fantastic. It’s cool to be a a wedding for once where you know (and are friends with) almost everyone. Their wedding was great and we love them and we can only hope they have as much fun at our as we did at theirs.

Since this was on a Sunday night in Paso Robles, I had to be mellow on the wine intake and bust out a 4 hour drive back home afterwards. “It’s just like when I used to go to shows in LA and get home super late before working the next day. No Problem,” I told Dawn. Well, to everyone’s disappointment, I am not entirely still my young, dashing self.
For some reason I/We thought a Taco Bell meal and some Frappuccinos would be beneficial to keeping me awake as long as possible. Luckily, we were right- but only because the combo of midnight-on-a-sunday Santa Maria Taco Bell and gas station bottled coffee drink was absolutely horrible. I mean, I didn’t drink them concurrently, but jeeeeeeesus… Disgusting. I have no idea how people can drink those Starbucks things. I couldn’t find one redeeming quality.

I was so happy to get some natural food in me the next day at lunch.

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Filed under Cars Are A Total Bummer, Deal With It, Food, I Am Still Punk, Ranting, Wedding Attack

Oh, hey blog! What’s up?

Yeah, it’s been a while. Not much going on ’round these parts. Heatwaves, fires, power outages, humidity… typical Southern California late summertime action. I’m contemplating growing a pre-wedding beard, but A)I look like a child molester when I have even the slightest semblance of facial hair, and 2)Dawn might kick my ass. Either way, my hair will be pretty long in the weeks leading up to the wedding, as my haircut schedule doesn’t match up to my marriage schedule. I refuse to get 2 haircuts in less than a month. Continue reading


Filed under Apple Zealotry, Gig Time, Hipsterism, I Am Still Punk, I call them 'records' and not 'cds' because I'm an elitist, Weather, Wedding Attack

As The Mighty Marvin Gaye Once Said, "What’s Goin’ On?"

Answer: nothing.
Sorry Marvin.

-Too many records to buy, too little $$$. New Sonic Youth tomorrow will burn a hole in my wallet, however.

-Lakers, Lakers, Lakers. I’ve kept my love of basketball (actually, just Lakers Basketball really) hidden from nearly everyone for a really long time.
I suppose there are several reasons for this:
A. Definitely not punk.
B. Too much Nike. All that swoosh represents is the enslavement of thousands of Chinese babies.
C. Team sports go against my ruggedly individualistic nature. The American dream, right?
Anyways, in my old age (57 this November), I’ve been getting to the bottom of the following:
A. Not being so much of a dick.
B. Getting back to my roots.
C. “It’s like Hamlet said- ‘To Thine Own Self Be True.'”
“Hamlet didn’t say that
“I think I remember Hamlet accurately.”
“Well, I remember Mel Gibson accurately, and he didn’t say that. That Polonius guy did.”
So that’s a lot of existentialism backing up my Los Angeles Lakers fandom. I’ve got no exit strategy for that point.

Ladies & Gentlemen: The Fabulous Stains! Finally available. So, the movie may not technically be very well filmed, but the message is undeniable. They should show this to young girls everywhere. It does a very good job of telling the story of strong girls without trivializing them. Netflix it- seriously. I first learned about it through the transcendently-before-it’s time Grand Royal Magazine. Which brings me to:

Grand Royal Magazine. If there was ever any one group of people that were/are consistently ahead of every curve, it’s the associates of Grand Royal. Initially, GR was the Beastie Boys vanity record label- however, it evolved into the most unbelievably trend-predating tastemaking organization in the history of pop culture. Not only did GR bring us 4 beyond-great Beastie Boys full lengths (and countless single/eps: see Aglio E Olio, Country Mike’s Greatest Hits, Root Down), but they also introduced most of the world to Spike Jonze (Sabotage. Where The Wild Things Are. Girlfilms. Genius!), At The Drive-In, artist sanctioned mp3s (really. Ask this guy), and the Mullet (I’m not kidding). Grand Royal Magazine (“Long Awaited, Much Anticipated, Grossly Outdated”) was their compendium of coolness. It only lasted 6 issues, but contained way too much excellence to post here. I have all the issues except for the first and fourth ones, which are nearly impossible to find- so let me know if you come across one. I re-read them all from time to time, when I feel like I need tips on Adidas Vs. Puma, building a demolition derby car, the best ways to harass Ted Nugent, Moog Synthesizers or the truly original expose on the mullet epidemic. Ultimately, the Beastie Boys’ unwavering ability to see the future got them out of the record label business before the shitstorm, and now Grand Royal Magazine is a memento of a cooler time- just the sort of thing that the magazine would’ve written about.

-Dinosaur Jr, Freak Scene. Had to “get” the remastered version of Bug (see first item, above). It sounds 1000 times better than the original version, and just fucking shreds. I am now 100% a Dinosaur Jr. fan, whereas I was only like 50-75% before Saturday. Also, perhaps I could work this verse into my wedding vows?
Sometimes I dont thrill you
Sometimes I think Ill kill you
Just dont let me fuck up will you
cause when I need a friend its still you



Filed under Blowing It, I Am Still Punk, I call them 'records' and not 'cds' because I'm an elitist, Ranting, Run-On Sentences, Vinyl Snobbery, Wedding Attack

I Am So Bad At Blogging

[Note to self: Catalina Island Adventure photoblog coming soon. Maybe.]

Ugh, I’m still mostly asleep for some reason. It’s not like I don’t get enough sleep- my incessant selfishness and lack of any real responsibility probably afford me too much. Luckily, I don’t let worrying about my budget for vinyl reissues at Insound keep me up at night. Usually. So here’s how I’ve been spending my days in my general post-adolescent malaise:

-Wedding planning. Almost done (yeah right. Jinx!). Much was accomplished in Paso Robles last weekend (a phrase that has never been typed before!)- cake tasted/arranged for (it’s gonna be good, and I don’t even like cake. Seriously.), invitations designed (I was a totally wannabe graphic designer for a while, so I was prepared to be a dick about the invitations. Luckily for me, my fiance is more than capable of arranging excellent looking invitations without my faux-knowledgable snide comments), and my Sound System Assistant was arranged for (Thanks, Turtle Boy).

-We decided to take Monday off for a leisurely drive back south, so we stopped in Malibu for lunch/early dinner. As with most things, I was generally unimpressed by Malibu. I enjoy all of the leftover architecture from the 30’s-40’s-50’s-60’s, but other than that, I really don’t see the big deal. Overrated, like the other 90% of Los Angeles. After we made a Lawyer Emergency Internet Pit Stop at the Panera in Santa Monica (I much prefer Santa Monica to Malibu, btw), we went the rest of the way home on PCH- though only out of necessity, since it weas now rush hour(s). Blech.

-I’ve sworn off physical record stores. I hate to say it, but it’s true. I have a spreadsheet on my phone (nerd) of about 300 different records I need to buy (yeah right), and have only managed to find 1 of them in 3 trips to different places. The exception, of course, is Amoeba, but I can’t drive there all the time. At least it took me 15 years of record buying to get to that point. Everyone else: keep going. I am an isolated case of extreme nerdiness and even more extreme jaded-ness.

-The one record I did get was Jane’s Addiction’s Nothing’s Shocking. As I may or may not have said before, I never liked Jane’s until this past year or so. I think it has to do with living in Southern California- Jane’s is everywhere (even the post office), and they wore me down. I remember hating this record in college. We had this neighbor that lived in an apartment behind our house, above our garage/practice space (which undoubtably sucked for him), and he was an older grad student who commuted (!) from Berkeley (!) 3 or 4 days a week. He was super wierd and tended to invade your space with unsettleing regularity. He used to just roll in through our back door, go through my cds and grab the ones he wanted to copy. He always traded me cds in return, although I rarely listened to them because he annoyed me and I am an asshole. One of the few I did listen to was Nothing’s Shocking, which Jason and I hated (also the 2nd Meat Puppets album- the one that Nirvana did all the songs from on Unplugged in NY. I still don’t like the Meat Puppets. Kurt Cobain really captures the vibe of the songs, while being 200% more tuneful than the original songs). Anyway, like Jeremy “Bummer” Machi says “We always become what we hate.”

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Filed under Blowing It, Cars Are A Total Bummer, Deal With It, Hipsterism, I Am Still Punk, I call them 'records' and not 'cds' because I'm an elitist, Ranting, Wedding Attack